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Thread: Having a large company and being married?

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    Default Having a large company and being married?

    I'm just curious on how this works: people who are incredibly rich are married, but how do they protect their assets and make sure their wife can't take a lot of money? I read prenups destroy marriages, so how do they do it?

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    Prenups.

    And prenups properly done don't destroy marriages. If a prenup "destroys" a marriage, there were other much bigger problems.
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    If you are starting out poor and become rich with the spouse you're married to, you likely didn't have a prenup and the spouse can get half (in most places).

    If you're starting out wealthy, you had attorneys protecting you by making sure a prenuptial agreement was in place before you tied the knot. The prenup just puts a ceiling on the price of the marriage, it doesn't destroy anything. People destroy relationships over a lot of things, but a prenup is just an agreement about the gains available from the marriage. At some point, one of the spouses may compute the cost of staying vs. the cost of leaving and decide the leaving is better, but that's likely because of something else within the relationship.
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    Yep, that's pretty much it. They have lawyers. I agree that if you started together and got wealthy together you'd be kind of a knob to try and cut her out. Whether or not there are children would also be a consideration. But I also agree with Eddie Murphy, If she met you and you're making $25 million a year and she has a job at a boutique making min wage plus commission, why should she get half?

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    I agree with what has been said above. Particularly if you became wealthy after getting married. That probably took long hours, mental distraction, probably not paying as much attention to the wife or spouse as a healthy couple should. Spouse may very well have been doing things to make you wealthy you don't even think of like taking care of the home obligations. Of course less financially fortunate families may be working just as hard, they just didn't have the luck, skills, drive, etc. to make a bunch of money.

    Now marrying into money is a completely different thing as mentioned above.

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    How about this: Know the person that you are marrying outside of the bedroom, put as much time into the marriage as you put into the business, be faithful to your spouse, be faithful to your children and remember that laying next to a pile of money isn't nearly as nice as laying next to the women you love. Do that and you won't have to worry about her "taking" a lot of money.
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    Quote Originally Posted by nealrm View Post
    How about this: Know the person that you are marrying outside of the bedroom, put as much time into the marriage as you put into the business, be faithful to your spouse, be faithful to your children and remember that laying next to a pile of money isn't nearly as nice as laying next to the women you love. Do that and you won't have to worry about her "taking" a lot of money.
    I like what you said Neal. But it's not always that simple. I had dinner with a friend tonight. He is German and worked and met his wife in Africa. Beautiful woman, but not a blue eyed blond. I've been married for years to a girl I met while working in Central America. Not a blue eyed blond either. And both of us have found it difficult because of cultural and prejudicial issues, but we have had long standing good marriages. Work eventually brought my friend and his wife from Africa to the US. We have both had some rough times, but been married a long time.

    I think back to the only other girl who I thought was marriage material in my dating history. She didn't tell me at the time, but she hated Florida and had a strong desire to move back to the Midwest in farm country. I would have hated that. I firmly believe that that desire would have broken us up over time. And she was a wonderful girl We had a great time while dating. And we were both in our mid 30's so we weren't just kids.

    As I was talking with my German friend, we both noted that how easy and socially acceptable it is in the US to divorce, rather than fight through problems. I think that is true. Society here has made it so acceptable to get a divorce that you may want to think about a prenup.

    JMO, but both sad and true.

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    It may because I'm a woman and going through a divorce and an entrepreneur (though far from a rich one at this point) but this question struck me as odd.

    The phrasing "Make sure the wife can't take a lot of money" makes my skin crawl...as if she doesn't deserve anything if she were to leave him and ought to be penniless if she doesn't stick with him. But I could be taking it wrong.

    Personally, I think every couple, even the not so rich, should have a pre-nup if they are taking any assets into the relationship (we were kids with nothing the first time around so it wasn't an issue) but that which is accumulated during the relationship should be split evenly. My last marriage ended with a lot of debt and no assets, so again, not an issue.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Patrysha View Post
    The phrasing "Make sure the wife can't take a lot of money" makes my skin crawl...as if she doesn't deserve anything if she were to leave him and ought to be penniless if she doesn't stick with him. But I could be taking it wrong.
    It probably wasn't a good choice of phrasing on the OP's part, but I'm sure it is influenced by the bias in American courts when it comes to domestic issues. We see it a lot - couples file for divorce with same income scenarios, but different alimony and child support results depending on who gets custody. There are some people that work that system (and many were trained by their parent to work that system).
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    That may be the public perception, but certainly not my reality. But there's not much in life I do "normal" - as a non-custodial parent paying 25% of my income to a man who makes double what I do. It runs in the family though...neither my mom or grandma did well in their divorce settlements either.

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