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sunrise_rachel
04-30-2013, 05:09 PM
I think it is missing something. I just can't put my finger on it.

By the way, creating a website is a pain. I learned a bunch, but still painful.

Sunrise at Home, LLC. | Work from home! (http://www.sunriseathome.com)

:)

MyITGuy
04-30-2013, 08:07 PM
Looks like you picked up on WordPress pretty quickly, Congrats!

Just a few things I noticed when looking through the site:

- You may want to look into hiding the Admin section on the bottom right of every page. You can bookmark the admin login page if needed.
- Talk to Me Page - You may just want to have the Contact Form listed, with the initial e-mail or Autoresponder configured to send out all of your contact methods to reduce any scraping of your contact information by those pesky bots
- Why Join with Me - The feedback section mentions "just to reiterate on the Star Program", but thats the first mention I see of it until I make it to the Star Program tab/page.
- Joining Us Page - Does Arise provide referral links that you can use to automatically populate the referral information, instead of relying on the user to provide this info? As an alternative, can you mimic their form to obtain the clients info and manually submit this info yourself?
- Joining Us Page - Update the text "see my “Requirements and Fees” page" under item #2 to automatically link to this page
-Opportunities - Look into an add-on/plugin that can make this easier for you (I.E. Here's a recent post that may interest you Five WordPress Job Board Solutions to Check Out (http://chrislema.com/five-wordpress-job-board-solutions-to-check-out/)) - These aren't the only ones out there and there may be some free ones as well...but its up to you to decide what features you need/want.

Wozcreative
04-30-2013, 08:17 PM
The website has a lot of grammatical errors. It also looks like the images you used still have watermarks on them, which means you did not pay to use them.
There is also no consistency when you switch between "us" and "me" its confusing..

Your about us section doesn't really tell me much about the business other than personal stuff.

People still use ICQ and AIM?

In general, it looks very home made, and the language used is not very professional and thought out. It seems like a personal bloggy website to me.

sunrise_rachel
04-30-2013, 09:33 PM
Looks like you picked up on WordPress pretty quickly, Congrats!

Just a few things I noticed when looking through the site:

- You may want to look into hiding the Admin section on the bottom right of every page. You can bookmark the admin login page if needed.
Fixed that.

- Talk to Me Page - You may just want to have the Contact Form listed, with the initial e-mail or Autoresponder configured to send out all of your contact methods to reduce any scraping of your contact information by those pesky bots

I like this idea. I have been thinking about it anyway.


- Why Join with Me - The feedback section mentions "just to reiterate on the Star Program", but thats the first mention I see of it until I make it to the Star Program tab/page.

Ugh, I was going off my previous layout. I didn't take that into consideration. Fixed that.

- Joining Us Page - Does Arise provide referral links that you can use to automatically populate the referral information, instead of relying on the user to provide this info? As an alternative, can you mimic their form to obtain the clients info and manually submit this info yourself?

No they don't have anything like that. The way I have it is the way it would need to be done. I want to put in images on what it looks like and such. Still trying to figure out how to add images into the page.

- Joining Us Page - Update the text "see my “Requirements and Fees” page" under item #2 to automatically link to this page

Did that.

-Opportunities - Look into an add-on/plugin that can make this easier for you (I.E. Here's a recent post that may interest you Five WordPress Job Board Solutions to Check Out (http://chrislema.com/five-wordpress-job-board-solutions-to-check-out/)) - These aren't the only ones out there and there may be some free ones as well...but its up to you to decide what features you need/want.

The only place the opps show up is in the Arise portal. You can only see the actual opps if you have access to the portal itself. I am under an NDA so I would rather do it myself rather than risk breaking that contract.


The website has a lot of grammatical errors. It also looks like the images you used still have watermarks on them, which means you did not pay to use them.
There is also no consistency when you switch between "us" and "me" its confusing..

Can you give me some specific grammar errors? The switching would be confusing, that will take longer than a minute to fix. I will look through it tomorrow and see. After I fix what I see I'll post back here. If there are more maybe you can point them out to me?

No I didn't pay for the photos. The site I used had a comp link to use them for free with the watermark. I chose that route. That will just have to stay.

Your about us section doesn't really tell me much about the business other than personal stuff.

I was at such a loss for the About Us page. I didn't really know what to put in there. Any input on what else would be greatly appreciated!

People still use ICQ and AIM?

*shrug* (need an emote for that) I really don't know, but since they are still around I am assuming they do. I just wanted to make sure I was available for any of the chats. I use Digsby so it isn't a big deal.

In general, it looks very home made, and the language used is not very professional and thought out. It seems like a personal bloggy website to me.

It is homemade! I don't want to (nor do I want to pay for it) hire it out. I want to have my hand in it. I also didn't want it to be so professional that it sounded cold. I will be the first to admit I am not a writer. Nope. I struggled, and still do, with essays. I struggle with any formal writing at all. So how can I make it sound a little more professional then? I don't want it to sound distant and impersonal.

vangogh
05-01-2013, 01:21 AM
It's definitely better than the original site on Blogger. Some thoughts.

I'm not crazy about the orange bars at the top and bottom. I think they distract from the main content of the site. The chat with us thing at the top could easily be added elsewhere and it's already in the navigation. If you want to make sure people notice the subscribe message, I'd move the form higher up on the page. People aren't likely to subscribe on your home page, because they'd want to see some content first. All your other pages have enough room for a sidebar and the sign up form could be placed in the sidebar toward the top of each page.

I agree that there are plenty of errors in the writing. For example at the bottom of your home page you have


You will not be disappointed in your service contact us and sign up today!

It needs to be two sentences



You will not be disappointed in your service. Contact us and sign up today!

And then I'd link some or all of the second sentence to your contact page.

Ideally you'd hire a copywriter for all the copy, but I'm guessing it's not something you want to do. If not have as many people as possible proof the site to catch all the errors or hire a proofreader to do it. Most every site has some typos, but they do send a message that you generally don't want to send.

I still think you want to get the message across as soon as possible about what you do. Right now below your logo the tagline reads "Where the sun rises at home" That doesn't really saying anything. Better would be something like "Helping you work from home" That makes it clear what you do and why I want to continue looking through the site.

I would remove the links page. I understand you want to give back to people who work with you, but there are better pages. A page like that is likely to be seen as spam by search engines, since they were a tactic used to manipulate search results for a long time. I don't think you need the message either. Once you have a few sites to link to, create a page like "Our Customers" or "My Customers" Even better make it a Testimonials page. Ask all your customers if they would write a sentence or two and below their testimonial include a link to their site.

I agree with Woz about bouncing back and forth between us and me. It should be one or the other. I'd also say you don't need a Why Join and a Join link in the navigation. All the pages under one could be included in either. It'll probably work best as a single category of navigation.

Hope that helps.

Wozcreative
05-01-2013, 10:21 AM
Just to point out all the grammatical errors:

HOME:
• Get answers to all your questions (no period)
• What we do for you (doesnt sound right at all)
• You will not be disappointed in your service contact us and sign up today!
• Keep up to date on opportunities available, discounts on CSP 101 and any other promotions and information! (too many "ands")

About us:
• "a little about me..." --- redundant to the title
• Mentoring and training have been my favorite. -- grammar
• I chose the “Sunrise at Home” name because instead of watching the sunrise on the way to work, in the car, with all the other traffic (ugh) we can now be at home with a cup of coffee in hand watching the sunrise. -- grammar
• Then walk down the hallway (or the next room) and go to work. -- grammar
• I will always be direct and give you the information straight forward. -- grammar
• So come aboard and check me out. I think you will be pleased. -- I'd use another word other than "check me out"

Opportunities:
• Service Revenue Rate: *no* released yet* -- grammar
• Service: Inbound Customer Service for telecommunications company. --- grammar

join with me page (grammar in the title has an issue)
• You would need to in order to partner with Arise. -- grammar
• Client Contracts – You are contracted with a client after certification. -- grammar
• Fee Information - I will keep records of the fees you paid to Arise. From the background check to the service fees per pay period. -- grammar ... dont start sentences with "from" -- you do this a lot on the site
• Just shoot me an email with the specifics of what you need and I will sent them to you. -- grammar.. its "send" not "sent"
• You do have access to some records through Arise as well. -- probably need to use "you will have access""... not you do
• If you look at the goals page there is more I am wanting to do in the future as we grow! -- grammar

--- anyway you get the picture.. Every page has every 3rd sentence wrong. Did you re-read any of the work you wrote? It is not enough that you write it and say you are no good. Write it, edit it, sleep on it, and edit again.

sunrise_rachel
05-01-2013, 11:14 AM
It's definitely better than the original site on Blogger. Some thoughts.

I'm not crazy about the orange bars at the top and bottom. I think they distract from the main content of the site. The chat with us thing at the top could easily be added elsewhere and it's already in the navigation. If you want to make sure people notice the subscribe message, I'd move the form higher up on the page. People aren't likely to subscribe on your home page, because they'd want to see some content first. All your other pages have enough room for a sidebar and the sign up form could be placed in the sidebar toward the top of each page.

OK, I took those out. I wasn't sure if I liked them anyway. Now about the subscribe. I can't figure out how to get that on the side. I have the page set up to full-width page because if I don't it moves it over to the left and automatically adds categories and archives. I don't want those and haven't figured out how to remove them other than going full-width.

I agree that there are plenty of errors in the writing. For example at the bottom of your home page you have



It needs to be two sentences




And then I'd link some or all of the second sentence to your contact page.

Ideally you'd hire a copywriter for all the copy, but I'm guessing it's not something you want to do. If not have as many people as possible proof the site to catch all the errors or hire a proofreader to do it. Most every site has some typos, but they do send a message that you generally don't want to send.

Working on getting a couple people I know who can write better than me to look at it :)

I still think you want to get the message across as soon as possible about what you do. Right now below your logo the tagline reads "Where the sun rises at home" That doesn't really saying anything. Better would be something like "Helping you work from home" That makes it clear what you do and why I want to continue looking through the site.

Good point. I have messaged the person that made my logo for me to have him change it for me. May be a couple days though.

I would remove the links page. I understand you want to give back to people who work with you, but there are better pages. A page like that is likely to be seen as spam by search engines, since they were a tactic used to manipulate search results for a long time. I don't think you need the message either. Once you have a few sites to link to, create a page like "Our Customers" or "My Customers" Even better make it a Testimonials page. Ask all your customers if they would write a sentence or two and below their testimonial include a link to their site.

I did that. I think I will make it a "members only" for now.

I agree with Woz about bouncing back and forth between us and me. It should be one or the other. I'd also say you don't need a Why Join and a Join link in the navigation. All the pages under one could be included in either. It'll probably work best as a single category of navigation.

Hope that helps.

I went through and changed all the I and me to we and us. I am going to comb through again just to be sure. As far as teh writing goes? Hopefully the people I have looking at it will suggest a few thing. Like I told Woz, I am not a writer. I can talk until I am blue in the face. I can't write for diddly.

OK all that being said. I think one of the problems (besides my writing) is the layout. I am using wordpress but most of the templates are blog style and I am trying to adapt them. I haven't really found templates that aren't blog style. Lord above knows I don't know CSS. I may have to browse through more than a couple hundred templates!

Wozcreative
05-01-2013, 01:58 PM
Not sure what you mean by blog style.. the framework looks correct to me with what you need.
The only problem is the logo disappears when you click other pages.

Regarding the writing, I am just pointing out how much errors there is and just looks like you have not even looked at the text you wrote. It seems that the english language is your primary one so that is not the problem, it is the effort you put into it. Perhaps you just dont like writing, in that case you should invest in someone else to do that for you. I can't trust any business person to give me business advice that can't bother to proof their own work.

Harold Mansfield
05-01-2013, 02:43 PM
OK all that being said. I think one of the problems (besides my writing) is the layout. I am using wordpress but most of the templates are blog style and I am trying to adapt them. I haven't really found templates that aren't blog style. Lord above knows I don't know CSS. I may have to browse through more than a couple hundred templates!



Yep, you may have to. How else will you find what you are looking for? Besides, you need to look around at some WordPress themes and websites so that you can see that they are just as diverse as any other kind of website. Seems like you are doing this blind and just doing whatever pops into your head.

You are just starting out. There is much to learn. Over time you'll learn a few tricks here and a few tricks there.
You have to remember that you are not only learning WordPress, but it seems that you are just beginning to learn the basic principles of web design. That's not something that you can rush through, plop in a few images and call it done.

But on your site itself? The very first thing that stood out to me is that your main home page image is not sized properly and is stretched, rather than sized to fit the slider.
Which brings up another good point. To get any good at managing your own site, you may want to look into some graphics tools to help you do some basic image manipulation.

You can use open source programs like GIMP, or see whatever is already installed in your computer...paint of whatever MS comes with.

What you have is better than what you had, but putting up a decent looking website isn't just something you can plop together over a weekend...at least not for a beginner.

And oh yeah, there is no such thing as "too professional". Have you ever heard anyone say, "I didn't do business with them because they were too professional"?
Bottom line is, you are going to have to get that "professional" look in order to have any pervcieved credibility. That doesn't mean that you need to have an expensive website built. It just means that what you do have needs to be tight, clear, well written, and follow the basic rules of structure and engagement.

vangogh
05-06-2013, 11:06 AM
I am not a writer. I can talk until I am blue in the face. I can't write for diddly.

It's really good you're aware of this and accept it. It is a strong reason though for hiring someone to write content for the site. Unfortunately the writing isn't going to give potential customers a good feeling. They'll read a little and come away with the sense that the site isn't professional and can't be trusted. Naturally that's going to be a big problem for the business.

While the design itself can be improved, if you choose a halfway decent theme it's probably not going to hurt. Your business is about business. I think the best approach would be to pick a business looking theme. I realize a standard looking business theme may not be what you ultimately want, but it's not going to turn people away. Get the copy in order first, because as it is now it probably will turn people away. Once the copy is in order you can look to improve the theme.