did project behind customers back----got caught

[huggytree]

a long time builder had a bad breakup with his carpenter....the builder lost a large project and his carpenter got the job instead...the builder lost the largr project for a number of reasons, but blames the carpenter for bad mouthing(that isnt the real reason though)

i am friends with and work with both of them...........the builder told me i was not 'allowed' to work on this large project with his ex-carpenter....i said ok(even though i kinda that who the heck do you think you are telling me what my business can do)..........the ex-carpenter gave me the plan for the house and it was 100percent different than the builders version and i found out all the reasons the customer dumped the original builder...........

the original builder was almost out of business(at the time) and the ex-carpenter was on the upswing with tons of work....i decided to do the house behind the back of the original builder....i even used a friends master plumber license # on the permit so my name wouldnt be on the house...i worked odd hours on the house to avoid him seeing my van...............

the original builder has made a recent come back...ive been working on his projects lately.....he brought up the subject with me and said 'he knew'.....i said sorry and 'i have to feed my family'.....his response is 'i cant trust you anymore since you said you wouldnt'.....things got pretty quiet after that between us that day(we were working on the same project).........i am bidding on his future projects and it sounds like im still his plumber.........

in the past he's been a $50,000 a year customer, but last year he was more like $10,000...........this year he will be back to $50,000 though

he has 'commanded' me not to do other projects in the past and ive done as he asks...this time i didnt because his reasoning was unjustified and i wanted to also work with his ex-carpenter(the house in question was a $20,000 project)

anything i can do to salvage this relationship???? i think it will just blow over as long as i continue to do a quality job on his projects

[nealrm]

Dump him. Any customer that "Command" you to not work on other project isn't worth the hassle. If he doesn't want to work with those companies or have those companies in anyway connected to his projects, that is his choice. Telling those he works with, they can't do business with them is way out of bounds. You may want to look up the legal definition of "Restraint of trade" in your state.

That said, you should not have gone behind his back in the manner you did. Your mistake was telling him one thing and doing another. You should have been clear upfront that who you do business with is your business and none of his concern. Working odd hours and using an others license reinforced the idea that you were doing something wrong.

As for "Salvage the relationship", are you willing to allow him to run your business? I willing to bet that if he pushes this attitude on others, he will find himself back at the $10,000 level in no time.

[KristineS]

I would have to agree that there are two separate issues here. One is the fact that he was trying to tell you what jobs you could take, something it was not his right to do. In that case, I just would have told him that you respect that he's upset with this other businessperson, but that has no bearing on your business, and while you understand there's bad blood, it is between those two individuals and not you. You are sorry if choosing to work with this other businessperson makes the first builder mad, but that's his choice. As far as you're concerned, both people/companies are valued customers and you hope to work with both parties again.

What you did, however, was sneak around behind the first guy's back, and take pains to disguise what you were doing which, even if that wasn't the intent, certainly makes you look untrustworthy. Being upfront could have saved you a lot of trouble, and certainly kept your reputation from taking a hit. By using another license and hiding the van, you basically let everyone know that you thought what you were doing was wrong, but you were doing it anyway. The only way to salvage the relationship would be to be upfront with the angry builder and tell him you messed up, and then never do anything like that again, ever. Even then it's going to take some time for trust to be rebuilt.

[huggytree]

the original builder probably doesnt know i worked odd hours and used a different plumbers license on the permit.....so only i know that i was being sneaky

this builder was my first home builder 5 years ago.....we used to trap shoot together and our families have gone out to dinner on multiple occasions...ive even had dinner at his home.....i think it will work itself out....he is a difficult client and very unorganized....but $50,000 a year in business is 12-15percent of my yearly sales...not something to just walk away from.......when i get busier i may drop him...he's probably 1st on my list

he remodeled my whole 1st floor on my own home last year....and i think he over charged me because i didnt get competitive bids....i trusted him and the project got a bit out of hand....quality was also poor in some areas.....i would have fired him, but i couldnt because he was also a customer...lesson learned there

[greenoak]

i would try not to talk about it...since you broke your promise to him...if you have to talk about it sometime i would apologze and say i cant make promises like that anymore....
. he can command all he wants...but you agreed....not next time tho!!!!
i hope it just blows over , sounds like a bad divorce between your guy and the other guy...not fair to you...

[huggytree]

he is annoying me horribly on my current project....he changes how he builds houses on every house....no 2 are ever the same....and i have to change my methods of plumbing each time.....he is not happy with my current method on this house....he wants me to tear down some of my work and redo it....i said since its done it would cost $1,000+ then went on to explain why my method is the best/most efficient....he argued a bit, but my counter was to explain that he needs to build 1 type of house and not change every house....that it was his problem because we cant have a steady method of plumbing because his houses keep changing (he builds styrofoam/ Green type houses----very strange)

im just about done with this customer anyways....its getting to the point that its not worth $50,000 to deal with him....never thought id say something like that...he has been difficult for 5 years on every house/project......i dont think anyone else would put up with him....he does change crews alot....me and the electrician are the only 2 that stick with him