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SumpinSpecial
05-29-2018, 08:02 AM
One of my new products has been getting really high page visits ever since I listed it, but no purchases. A few days ago I tweaked the description to make it more appealing and customer-friendly. (The original was copied from the manufacturer's website, and overly technical.) Copywriting is something I'm still learning to do well. Can you guys take a look and let me know if you think it reads well now, or is it still bad?

You can find it here. (https://www.somethingspecialpetsupplies.com/collections/featured-products/products/bird-dog-life-jacket)

Harold Mansfield
05-29-2018, 10:15 AM
All the elements are there, I would just rearrange some and make others more pronounced.

1. *I would make the price bigger, bolder and a dark shade of green or a color that matches your design.

2. The video is good and short. I would lead with the video before anything else. Good video helps people imagine themselves using the product.

3. I would make my featured (lead) image one with an actual dog, not the graphic. I think the close up of the dog on the rock by the water, or the dog in the hat on the grass are the 2 best.

4. *I'd make your add to cart buttons a different color. Something darker that's easier to see and stand out but still matches the design. The white text against that light yellow/goldish color can be hard to see and appears passive. Even a darker shade of that would be better.

5. Maybe try different copy on your buttons. Instead of "Add to cart", try "Buy Now". Or both. Try an add to cart button at the top and a buy now after the full description.

The call to action should be the last thing. Don't make them have to think and scroll back up. Make it a fluid motion that ends with an option to get the item now, and complete that transaction in as few steps as possible.

7. Try using bold headers to make the features stand out more and draw the eye.

Example above the 1st paragraph: For the canine athlete or For Active Dogs
Above the 3rd paragraph: Durable Construction or Made to Last

Make "Looking for another size?" larger. The same size as the header.

You want to use the text as design as well. Headers make the features stand out, draw the eye, and give you an opportunity to resonate with customers whom those things appeal to or answer concerns.

8. Last but not least, give people an easy option to contact you with questions about the products. Think about adding a chat window on the site that gives you real time interaction with potential customers. It would also help to make it look like someone is really home and available to them should they need you.

*If you darken the buy buttons, then make the larger bolder price the same color.

All just my opinion of course and you still need to dig deep on your targeting to make sure you're targeting the right people properly. But once you get the right people to the site, the destination needs to be dialed in, instill confidence, and make it easy for them to do business with you without having to think.

turboguy
05-29-2018, 01:47 PM
You seem to have a major issue with your security certificate. Using Chrome I had to fight through tons of warnings to get to your page.

I have some other thoughts but don't have much time right now so I will post more later.

SumpinSpecial
05-29-2018, 05:37 PM
You seem to have a major issue with your security certificate. Using Chrome I had to fight through tons of warnings to get to your page.

I have some other thoughts but don't have much time right now so I will post more later.

Really?! Ack, I'll investigate that right away. It shouldn't be the case.

Harold, thank you for the feedback. I'll do as much of that as I can (which is a lot of it).

turboguy
05-29-2018, 09:03 PM
I did visit the page on ie and had no problems unlike my try with chrome.

Harold Mansfield
05-30-2018, 11:01 AM
FYI, I didn't have any issues accessing the site using Chrome.
I did run it through whynopadlock and it 2 errors did come up.
Both look easy to fix.

1. Ensure that http requests are redirected to https
2. Your hosts probably needs to update your Let's Encrypt certificate.

https://www.whynopadlock.com/results/8866a369-00f6-4088-900b-da10ba519ee2

SumpinSpecial
06-01-2018, 02:12 PM
Thanks Harold. I didn't have any problem with Chrome, either. But I'll take a look at the certificate.

pixies66
11-08-2018, 10:03 PM
One of my new products has been getting really high page visits ever since I listed it, but no purchases. A few days ago I tweaked the description to make it more appealing and customer-friendly. (The original was copied from the manufacturer's website, and overly technical.) Copywriting is something I'm still learning to do well. Can you guys take a look and let me know if you think it reads well now, or is it still bad?

You can find it here. (https://www.somethingspecialpetsupplies.com/collections/featured-products/products/bird-dog-life-jacket)

this is nice. What software or plugin are you using if you don't mind me asking to process the sales?